It Had to be Me
by Flash Foreward
Summary: All that Caspian knows of Narnia's history comes from stories, which were passed from generation to generation and changed over time. So, when he finds himself alone with Edmund Pevensie, he decides it's time to hear the stories first hand.


**A/N:** Another story inspired by a conversation with a friend...I love writing Edmund!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the Chronicles of Narnia.

**It Had to be Me **

Caspian ran his hand along the stone wall, peering at the drawings of the kings and queens and of Aslan as his fingers brushed across them, trying to ignore the gnawing guilt in the back of his mind. The lower levels of the How were fairly empty, and Caspian could hear the sounds of practice swords being crossed floating down from above. He shook his head and dropped his hand to his side, berating himself for his foolishness.

He turned away from the wall, set to return to the surface and his army, not daring to return to the chamber harboring the Stone Table, not after what he'd nearly done. But he'd hardly begun walking when he heard the crunch of footsteps behind him. He backed up against the wall he'd previously been admiring, his hand on the hilt of his sword, though he'd no idea what enemy would be lurking behind him now.

As he stood at the ready, Edmund Pevensie rounded the corner, his head bowed and his hand on the hilt of his own sword. Caspian relaxed.

"King Edmund," he said. The boy looked up at him quickly as though started, his grip on his sword tightening slightly. Caspian glanced at the sword, then at the tunnel behind Edmund, then brought his eyes to rest on Edmund's face. "What brings you here?" he queried, eyeing the king's sword.

"I was making sure nothing of her remained," was Edmund's reply. Caspian nodded, not needing to ask who Edmund was referring to. "What of you, Prince Caspian?" Edmund asked, releasing his sword and dropping his hand to his side. "Why aren't you going over battle plans with Peter?"

"Peter thought it best to save battle plans for tomorrow. He thinks the events of today require a rest," Caspian said, eying Edmund as the younger boy's face grew dark. Caspian wondered at that, thinking back to the stories he'd once heard of old Narnia, trying to recall the bits with the Kings and Queens of old.

"Well," Edmund said, interrupting Caspian's thoughts and turning away. "Shall we join them, then?"

"Wait," Caspian said, Edmund turned to him, his head tilted in confusion. "Why did you…?" Caspian asked, gesturing towards the turn at the end of the tunnel.

"Why did I what?" Edmund asked.

"Earlier, with _her_, and now…why…why you?"

"It's a long story," Edmund said.

"We've got a bit of time," Caspian replied. Edmund nodded and leaned against the stone wall, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Haven't you heard all this? From that teacher of yours?"

"Those were stories, stories that could have been true or could have been false. I…I'd like to hear it from you."

"All right," Edmund said. "It's a bit long, shall we sit?" Caspian nodded and Edmund led the way back to the cavern with the stone table. Ice was still melting on the ground, but Caspian tried not to look at it as he sat on a rock jutting out from the wall. Edmund walked around the broken table, trailing his fingers along the faded writing.

"When we first came to Narnia," Edmund began. "It was always winter. Always winter and never Christmas."

"Because of the White Witch," Caspian interjected. Edmund glanced at him.

"Do you want to hear this or tell it?" he snapped.

"Sorry," Caspian muttered. Silence hung in the air for a few minutes, an uncomfortable silence, and Caspian shifted nervously as Edmund came around the table to stand before him.

"Lucy was the first one to come here, and when she told us about how she'd found a magical world in the back of the wardrobe and had tea with a faun, we all thought she was making up stories," Edmund continued. "Especially me. See, she claimed she'd been gone for hours, but she said this only a few moments after we'd left the room with the wardrobe.

"We went to look, but it was just a wardrobe, with a back and everything. Lucy was more than a bit upset…I was no help, really.

"She went through again late at night, and I followed her. I still thought she was playing a game…but, when I reached the back of the wardrobe, it wasn't there. Instead, there was a forest." Edmund paused, his face dark, and Caspian waited. "I tried to find Lucy," Edmund mumbled. "Really, I did.

"But _she_ found me instead. And offered me Turkish delight and the chance to be a prince and…when we came again, when all of us came, I almost cost us our lives, and Narnia its freedom.

"So, you see, Caspian," Edmund said. "It had to be me."

"What had to be you?"

"I had to be the one, I had to stop her. To stop you from bringing her back."

"But, why? That was so long ago."

Edmund shook his head. "It doesn't matter," he said. "I thought I'd forgiven myself, everyone else had…even Aslan and Lucy's faun…but, when I saw her here, all the guilt came back," Edmund looked Caspian in the eye and Caspian realized just how old the other boy looked, despite his youth. "It had to be me."

Their eyes held for a few more moments and Caspian slid from the rock he'd chosen as his seat. He held out his hand an Edmund took it, shaking it slowly, their eyes locked once again.

"Ed! Caspian! Are you down here?" Peter's voice reached them and they let go their hands. Caspian stepped back and turned to stand beside Edmund as Peter appeared at the chamber's door.

"Just measuring the damage, Peter," Edmund said. Peter nodded, glancing quickly around the room.

"All right, well, we're getting ready to have dinner," he said. "You'd best come back up."

"We're on our way."

Peter nodded and left, and Caspian glanced at Edmund once more before the king of old led him from the chamber. As they returned to the surface, to their army and their friends, Caspian mulled over what he'd been told, and the greater respect he had for Edmund Pevensie.


End file.
